2022 Detroit Lions Identify Bracket Match: The Elite 8

September 3, 2022

Properly, hiya there. It’s me, conversational-tone Jeremy. I’ve missed you. Skilled Jeremy has saved me imprisoned due to boring work stuff. One thing about cuts, preseason, and one thing referred to as “Onerous Knocks.”

However since that man is damaged down, battered and very sleep-deprived, he’s let me out to deal with some unfinished enterprise.

The 2022 Detroit Lions Identify Bracket could also be on life help, however damnit, it’s not useless. After we final left the event, we had been lamenting the defeat of Halapoulivaati Vaitai in a merciless act by the Identify Bracket Hacker. However peace had been restored, and we had a comparatively clear Candy 16. That has left us with simply eight opponents left, a number of who’re not even on the staff, apparently. Maybe they’ll make one closing impression in Detroit earlier than they’re forgotten with the Brandon Powells, Tim Toones and Xavier Proctors.

Listed below are your Elite Eight contenders for the 2022 Identify Bracket crown:


1. Amon-Ra St. Brown vs. 2. Brady Breeze

All through the offseason St. Brown was gaining momentum to win this complete factor. He fought off the Identify Bracket Hacker who was pushing an pro-Amani Oruwariye agenda, and regardless of the cornerback garnering over 4800 votes (typical polls get about 1,000 whole), St. Brown scored 6,247 votes on the way in which to a considerably decisive victory .

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His Elite Eight matchup is towards a long-departed buddy of ours. Brady Breeze was waived with an damage designation almost three weeks in the past, however the legacy of his hypothetical tropical island chain of eating places stay. Should you don’t instantly crave a Mai Tai if you learn this child’s identify, you’re dwelling life improper.


Who has the higher identify?

  • 83%

    Amon-Ra St. Brown

    (307 votes)

366 votes whole

Vote Now

1. Kalil Pimpleton vs. 6. Saivion Smith

File this underneath: Too quickly. Our juggling buddy has taken his skills to The Large Apple. Kalil Pimpleton stole our hearts throughout “Onerous Knocks.” Watching him drop that landing go within the closing preseason sport—and his subsequent unhappiness—was devastating to look at. However what higher approach for us to indicate him our appreciation for his onerous work than to ship him off with an imaginary Identify Bracket trophy that doesn’t—and can by no means—exist?

It’s onerous to think about somebody with the final identify Smith making it this far. I’m not saying you guys messed this factor up, however I’m additionally not saying you didn’t. Trinity Benson clearly deserved to be on this spot, however too a lot of y’all can’t separate the identify from the participant. For disgrace.


Who has the higher identify?

  • 70%

    Kalil Pimpleton

    (257 votes)

  • 29%

    Saivion Smith

    (108 votes)

365 votes whole

Vote Now

5. D’Andre Swift vs. 3. Quintez Cephus

This can be a fascinating matchup. It’s not usually you get third-year contenders who’ve by no means gained this factor this deep into the event. Usually, you make your deep runs within the event within the first couple years, after which Identify Fatigue units in and also you’re forgotten like one in all Andy’s toys. What an ungrateful jerk that Andy is. I saved my Daffy Duck plush toy by means of highschool, and I’m simply now realizing that’s one thing I perhaps shouldn’t be pleased with.

Anyway, Swift and Cephus had been 2020 draft mates, however they’re bitter enemies on this event. It’s merely a matter of style between the 2. Are you an aspiring Dad Joke author? Then Swift has all of the puns you possibly can presumably need. Should you’re only a fan of listening to fascinating names and sounds smushed collectively, Quintez Cephus is your man.

4. Ifeatu Melifonwu vs. 3. Zein Obeid

Ifeatu Melifonwu is a meal of a reputation, with the third-most syllables on the staff (7)—trailing solely the aforementioned Halapoulivaati Vaitai and Amani Oruwariye. I keep that Melifonwu is among the most delightful names to say. Plus, how many individuals are you aware who’ve a primary and final identify that each in finish u? Large originality factors right here.

Zein Obeid goes to be an excellent trivia query 15 years from now. He had one of the vital fascinating backstories of anybody on the roster, and he was somebody I hoped would grow to be a “Onerous Knocks” star. However Obeid retired only a week into coaching camp. He didn’t even dangle round lengthy sufficient to get a Wikipedia web page, however perhaps if we reward him a Identify Bracket Championship, he may be extra well-known than the kid from the Arabic model of “The Voice Youngsters.”


Who has the higher identify?

  • 84%

    Ifeatu Melifonwu

    (306 votes)

362 votes whole

Vote Now